Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
