If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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