there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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