Betty ford says i'm here all night
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
