Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
