they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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