is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
