I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Randomize
