If i come over, it means nothing
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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