isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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