Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
