I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
