i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
