white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Dick very happy bro
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
