I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
