I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
He has the fingertips of a God
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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