This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
How does it feel to date your dad?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
