I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize
