Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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