currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
So much Jack, so little girl.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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