summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
