So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
