he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
she looked like the before picture.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
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