he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
