I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
