Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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