Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
