fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
