ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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