I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
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