i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
either way he was missing a nipple.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
