She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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