If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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