i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
All I want is dick and wine.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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