Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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