D3 body, D1 cock
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
