He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Randomize
