I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Randomize
