And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
