Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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