I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
