It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize