I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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