So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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