You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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