your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
