Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
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