Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
