If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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