she's into porn, im staying here tonight
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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